I once heard that aging would bless one with the gift of not giving a fuck as much, and I looked forward to enjoying that gift when I entered my fourth century decade on this planet in late October last year. Then came the elections a week later and I guess that gift doesn’t work on everyone because hoo boy did I give a lot of fucks about things that day.
Six months after that election, I think I’ve been giving a fuck about things more than ever. Particularly my safety, well-being, and future here. Will I still have any rights as a single bisexual woman of color by the end of this year? Is the modern-day Gestapo gonna hunt down “illegal” immigrants in my blue city? Will social security and Medicare still exist when I need it 25-ish years from now? Will California still stay blue? Will my immigrant/LGBTQ+/POC friends also be safe? Is my measles vaccine from childhood still good? And then there are usual worries (money, bills, making sure I have a working car, my stupid eczema, etc.) piled onto that. So much for that gift.
It’s wild; just a year ago I felt relatively safe here in the States. I even had hopes that all who hated TFG (and it seemed like a majority of people) would vote against him and not look back. Now here I am watching politicians who are supposed to protect us voting in inept clowns who will ruin us and what’s left of our freedoms in this forsaken country. When I’m doing more research lately on where/how I can immigrate (my day job happens to be in demand in at least two countries I wouldn’t mind moving to) over writing my latest work-in-progress, that means shit is getting serious.
I seek out escapism from the madness, like watching movies on TCM and hitting up beaches and cat lounges. But I also see others casually shopping from Target and Amazon and posting on those other social media sites as if there’s no madness at all. I should have found some escapism from that annual event of gauche known as the Met Gala earlier this month, but not only was I not feeling it this year, it looked a lot more tone deaf than ever. It’s a shame because I saw some of my faves attend it. (Some people on Bluesky defended the Gala saying it’s all to raise money for the costume institute of the museum. OK. PBS still needs funding and I’m not seeing any big-name celebs wearing high-end couture to support that program.) I’m still fighting for good causes…but after seeing this, I now question: who am I protesting with? Is it with someone who did their best to save democracy last year by voting for Harris, or someone who willingly fucked around and just found out that their Medicare is being gutted and are now pissed?
When Roe v Wade was overturned three years ago, I (who had already chosen to be childfree) chose to get back at the conservative asshats of the Supreme Court by opting for sterilization. If they were going to take my reproductive rights away, I might as well exercise mines while I still have them. The current regime wants to go after birth control and turn women into baby-makers and nothing more; meanwhile, my choice to get that bisalp continues to age well. But now I stare down a far greater threat to my well-being and future in this country. I may not have the gift of not giving a fuck as much as I age. But if being aware of things is a gift, then I got it, and it’s a pretty nice gift. It’s far better than being ignorant.
This should’ve been mentioned a week ago, but last week marks my three-year anniversary since I’ve gone cuckoo for keto. These days, I’m more low-carb than keto; I can eat a bit of bread or Godiva chocolate if I want to, but it’s not that often. Remembering how I used to look like before I ditched the carbs and sugar is my main motivation for staying low-carb. And, yep, that’s (headless) me in those pics! No airbrushing here, and no Ozempic or lipo involved. Left is me before I started doing keto, and the right pic is me just a week ago.
By the way, as it is with all diet plans, YMMV. Going low-carb worked for me, and it may work for you or not. And making it work for you is one thing, but keeping at it is another ballgame. I’ve managed to maintain this whole time because 1) I don’t want to look like how I did in that left pic ever again, and 2) having been away from the stuff that made me gain weight for so long, I no longer miss them, and thus I don’t need them. A friend treated me to lunch at a Japanese restaurant weeks ago, and I did have some sushi (ack, rice!), but I didn’t eat all of the rolls in one sitting, nor did it make me crave sushi afterwards.
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It’s been pouring in the Bay Area. I used to not like the rain when I was younger, but now, I think I only dislike it is when I have to drive in it 😆. Given that our state is prone to fires and knowing Temu Hitler and his henchmen would rather watch us burn down instead of grow a soul and help, I’ve since appreciated the rainy days. What faucet again??
Also, are umbrellas not cool anymore? How are some of you going by in the rain without a damn umbrella? On top of it being flu season right now! 😒
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I’d boo it too.
🚨 CANADIAN HOCKEY FANS BOO DURING U.S. NATIONAL ANTHEM AT OTTAWA SENATORS GAME
Wondering if the boos will ever be done in the States. (Side note: I won’t be calling it “US” or “USA” for a long while as I feel like we’re no longer “united” here.) I’m not holding my breath for it to happen at the Super Bowl, but maybe it could happen at the 2025 NBA All-Star Game, which takes place in SF. And as for some ‘Muricans returning the favor and booing the Canadian anthem, it’s nothing compared to what they cheer for (like Nazi garbage).
2024 Grammys >>>>>> 2025 Grammys, yep I said it. Biased me liked last year’s guest lineup. Joni Mitchell and Tracy Chapman performed, a Celine Dion appearance, Mariah presenting, Miley and Kylie winning Grammys, no fire disasters, and this forever diva-glam moment from Xtina:
I was hoping I entered my 40s in the same confident fashion. I think I achieved 1/25th of it.
Speaking of the Grammys, has it been 25 years since J-Lo wore that dress and Xtina won Best New Artist and got all the Britney fans mad? What a time.
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A little advice, and go ahead and call me a hater of your fave, but if you’re all for supporting trans rights, don’t ever be caught in 4K saying “both sides are the same” not too long ago. That uneducated mentality is why trans rights (and much more) are being gutted now, and you’ll never ever get a “yaass queen” from me. Only one side has been in favor of supporting trans rights, and I still find it baffling that some Americans allowed an overseas incident, amplified by misinformation packaged as “news” on social media, to make them believe “both sides are the same” and that it became their deal breaker in last year’s election. It’s like 2016 all over again, but far fucking worse!
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It’s still a bummer to see some of my favorite celebs/people/accounts still use the other social media sites and not even join Bluesky (are they that ignorant over the fascists that own those sites?), but it’s another reason why I prefer to be a fan instead of a stan when it comes to public figures.
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I know, I’ve been very political lately. Anyone who follows me here or on Bluesky knows what sides I’ve taken, and I make no apologies over it. I’ve read remarks that artists should “keep their politics to themselves”, and I’m probably making it tough for those who try to separate the art from the artist. But I’m still going to stand for what I believe in, and I’ll still be grateful for those who will still support my work along the way. I just refuse to be blind to the unconstitutional bullshit happening right now that could affect me and those who didn’t vote for the convicted felon. I still love my trashy soap opera glamour and I still escape to it, but supporting (or in this case, restoring) democracy matters to me, too.
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Finally, I got something special coming a week from now! (No, it’s not a a full-face pic of me; y’all aren’t ready for that.) Stay tuned…
It’s Martin Luther King Jr. Day–the lone event worth celebrating today. Given what’s happened to this damn country in the past three months alone, this holiday hits different this year. Through ongoing education and activism, the beliefs of MLK Jr will not only live on, but will assist those who choose to resist the incoming tyranny. After all, it’s better to honor a king over a felon.
There’s something about the term “good girl” that never sat right with me. It’s what old male geezers say to young women in the workplace when the woman does something good at her job. It’s so 1950s, when Stepford wives and Doris Day-esque nice girls defined femininity while men got to be rebels without a cause with their leather jackets and cigarettes. It’s smack of submissiveness to the patriarchy and reeks of gender stereotypes; boys get to be “bad” and be rulers, fighters, and bed-hoppers, while girls can only be “good” and be rescued by the man for the sake of love and happiness. It’s something I wouldn’t say to my female pet if I had one. And it’s definitely why you’ll never catch me going near that Good Girl perfume. (I’m that petty to where I don’t even touch their sample vials in my Sephora perfume sets.)
It was not Marilyn Monroe or Eleanor Roosevelt, but a University of New Hampshire student named Laurel Thatcher Ulrich who, in 1976, said “well-behaved women seldom make history…” And in the early 1980s, then-Cosmopolitan Editor-In-Chief Helen Gurley Brown was attributed with that quote in the header pic (though she actually never said those words). Over four decades later after those quotes were made and I still see some women who’d rather “go to heaven” and be “well-behaved”. They’re now the Trad Wives, the ones who smile to look pretty for the guys, and the ones who vote like their man even if their vote takes away their rights. To be a “good girl” these days, in a landscape that witnessed a male convicted felon/rapist/all-around POS steal take the highest office in the country (again) and her abortion rights gutted, is to blindly dance in a field of landmines. Meanwhile, the “bad boys” have morphed into Douche Bro Incels, with control over women being their modus operandi. They’re no longer the good-looking rebel smelling nice and charming the skirts off the nice girls; they’re now the ugly try-hard looking older than his age who reeks of Sauvage and wants to rape the skirts off the nice girls. Why should women still play nice with the “your body my choice” assholes? And even when women do good, there’s always going to be a guy or ten thinking she’s “bad” because she supported Kamala and pro-abortion rights.
And it’s why I have no problem being a Bad Girl. If being strong, assertive, and doing things your way makes me “bad” to some “men,” so be it. Guess you can say I’ve been in my Bad Girl era for a while now. I haven’t nor will I do actual bad things like rob or murder anyone or support Nazis. But I’ll go against stupid patriarchal values, vote to support women’s rights, and enjoy consensual sex for fun when I want to. I’ll never smile to look pretty for the guys and I’m definitely not a man’s incubator. I don’t need men for love, sex, and money as I’m also attracted to other genders and I make good money on my own. I don’t want to get married and not only am I childfree, but childfree AND sterilized. Some vile conservatives took my reproductive rights away, and my Bisalp from last year is my lick back. (I also don’t want kids in this life, so suck on that, Elon!) So call me a Bad Girl. Besides, it’s more fun to go everywhere instead of just heaven.
And to the White Broligarchy that wants us women to play nice and make babies for them, this Bad Girl dedicates these songs to you!
(Yes, I’m aware I posted the last song in my last entry. Works for this entry, too!)
Like many real ones with social media these days, I have joined the land of blue skies. I haven’t abandoned the right-wing cesspool known as Twitter just yet, although I may consider it if I get more followers on Bluesky than Twitter. The Bluesky app also needs some work, but I must say: it’s soooooo refreshing to see a social media site not bogged down by its MAGA manchild owner, vile right-wing trash, algorithms that are obviously drunk, and dumb bots. Here’s hoping the site stays the course and doesn’t devolve like Twitter.
I’m also on Threads and still have my IG. I got a TikTok but I haven’t touched it for a year now. (I’m just not a TikTok girl.) In the hierarchy of SM posting, Bluesky now gets first dibs on my short-form nonsense, then Threads, and, if I feel like it, Twitter.
My Vegas birthday trip pics will be coming shortly. I’ve posted some on my socials a few weeks ago, but I got a lot more pics and a whole lot to say about them!
I travel for my day job a few times a week, and some of the things I’ve been seeing on the digital billboards when I take 880 North back home…😒”Be Kind”? “Choose Love”?? What in the sappy Etsy boymom hell is that? Many people in this country certainly weren’t kind at all at the polls two weeks ago!
Meanwhile, that parallel universe is looking more lovely by the day. We’re all looking forward to what the Kamala administration will bring to this country after her landslide election win two weeks ago, the House and Senate going blue, Trump and Elon finally going to jail, the racists/misogynists/Nazis all staying pissed on their Truth Social accounts, and next summer bringing us the release of Xtina’s newest album and the Batgirl movie. *sighs*
I think I found THE cold-weather fragrance…
…and THE scent for femme fatales, divas, and the bad girls your mother warned you about. In other words, MY kinds of scent! It’s a few steps above Black Orchid, which I also own, and that’s all I can say because I’m not well-versed in describing fragrances and its notes (and that’s something coming from a novelist-by-night).
Someone send me back to Vegas for the next seven months with a $15,000/month stipend to cover lodging, food, gas, bills, my rent back home, and miscellaneous. I only say this because the Penguins aka my hockey team won all their games while I was in Vegas. Superstitions and all that.
I’m really gonna miss Rafa. It was only a matter of time before he hung up his racket for good. The first time I saw him play was Wimbledon 2008; I tuned in after getting curious over the whole Nadal-Federer rivalry going on then. That Men’s Finals match, honey…talk about an intro! I enjoyed watching him play ever since, and he was the total package: talented, class act, and, yup, a hottie. 😘Him and Federer defined one hell of an era in Men’s Tennis that I doubt can be topped any time soon. Happy trails, Rafa! 🫶
Ending this post with a song that will go multi-platinum in the households of young women fighting against the emboldened, yucky incels. Listen to the lyrics and you’ll know!
This was part of the soundtrack of my recent road trip (which I’ll get to posting about soon), and, as a forever fan of Riot Grrl rock, that song will go multi-platinum in my house by next year.
If I lived in a sane country that had some awareness of what was at stake in this year’s election, I wouldn’t be writing what I’m about to write. I wouldn’t even have time to write something here, for I would’ve been tired from all the partying I did in the wake of Kamala Harris winning the election on the night of November 5th. Instead, I woke up on November 6th and found out that many Americans chose hate, prejudice, ignorance, and a Emeril-style BAM! of fascism, over joy, optimism, and a bright future for all Americans regardless of political affiliation.
I’d ask why, but I already knew the answers in case I had to face the harsh reality of a Harris loss. Shameful, vile traits such as sexism, racism, and ignorance that had been ingrained in others had become accepted and even normalized ever since *that guy* first came into office eight years ago. And in those eight years came the rise of inceldom, (thanks to figures like Andrew Tate, Joe Rogan, and Jordan Peterson influencing young men), growing police brutality against innocent black people, misinformation on social media, and distrust in women who also were victims of abuse. Then there’s also the racism Obama had to put up with during his presidency, once denounced during his years, but normalized when *that guy* and his racism happened. It all equaled to a demented country that did not want to see a woman–let alone a woman of color–in place of power such as the presidency. It didn’t matter how qualified she was, or who her opponent was. A smart, strong, confident woman (and more so if she’s a woman of color) is now seen as a threat to modern America, not just by the ass-backwards males, but by the pick-me women clouded with jealousy as well. If Hillary and Kamala couldn’t win (even though Hillary should’ve won–stupid-ass outdated Electoral College), then likely neither can Taylor Swift or Beyonce if they ran for president against, say, Kid Rock.
I had hopes Harris would win; I didn’t expect a landslide, but that the race would be called for her on Election night. A few red states would flip for her. I also toyed with the possibility of the election going on for days, given all the people that voted. I knew the opposition against Harris was there but thought she would defeat it (not easily, but defeat it one way or another). I was shocked on how large that opposition was. It’s like many people really haven’t learned from 2016 and chose to return to that godawful chaos.
By the way, I can never be gracious and classy to a rapist/convicted felon, not even in defeat. Why be nice with someone who clearly wants to ruin your life and those who you support? One thing I wished for Harris to have done was demand a recount of all votes in the country instead of conceding to *that guy* (who, as of 11/8/24, 4:50PM PST, is still crickets, as his MAGA cronies…🤔) the day after.
It’s returned: America is, once again, a joke. And a far bigger and unfunnier one this time than in 2016. Other nations–with their universal health care, six-plus months paid parental leave, and low/free costs to higher education–are back to laughing their asses off at us. The American optimism that sparked when Harris entered the presidential race and carried on into the Summer Olympics, the Democratic National Convention, and in the many Harris rallies that saw hopefuls flaunting the red, white, and blue like it’s the Clinton 90s all over again, is now a bittersweet memory. Sweet in that there looked to be promises of a new golden era for this country, and bitter in that we were also blind to the many people who would assassinate that optimism on Election Day because “she’s a woman!” and “eggs are too expensive these days!”
To all those who backstabbed Joe Biden (including those who vote Democratic), mainstream media that showed their biases against Biden and Harris in favor of ratings, the “both sides are the same” crowd, the ones who chose not to vote because “genocide”, those who thought Harris was “not black” or wouldn’t support black men, those who don’t even live in the US that groaned about how they “don’t care” about our election thinking it doesn’t matter in their country (bless their hearts), and those who believe “he will not affect ME because I voted for him!!”, you all gleefully Fucked Around and now welcome to the Find Out stage. I hope you are all happy.
Those saying *that guy* “beat” two women, I raise you two women that DID beat him:
May they have all the security and protection (and maybe a way out of the US) because they will need it more than ever now.
Is there a silver lining in this election? Just one, but only for SF Giants fans and it’s petty: the World Series champs Dodgers get to meet *that guy* in their White House visit next year. 🤭 Hope it was worth going over the luxury tax for all those free agents, Bums!
I recently said on my socials that I’m both childfree and sterilized, in response to an incel scumbag trying to claim what will never be his. I may not want kids, but I still voted for, among other things, the kids who are unable to vote this year in hopes for a better future for them. To see this polarizing sociopolitical environment the children are growing up in is scary, from them worrying about getting a proper education to them worrying about being the next victim of cyberbullying or, worse, a school shooting. This wasn’t my childhood, and I thank those who voted Democratic during my childhood/teen years in the late 80s to when I finally reached voting age in 2002. I didn’t want this generation of children to worry no longer. I tried. But tell me again how childfree women are sociopaths and selfish, JD Vance.
Some positives on my part: I understood the assignment since the start of this Election year. I was aware of who the GOP candidate would be. I voted for Biden in the Primaries, looked forward to voting for him on Nov. 5th, then supported and voted for Harris, and even attended two of her rallies during my Vegas trip. I may be in California where the election would’ve been called Harris at exactly 8:01PM Election night (and did), but my vote was also for those whose blue vote would be drowned out in their red state. Not once did I believe Biden was “too old” for the presidency and I didn’t want him to drop out, despite the heinous opposition against him. And not once did I tell everyone to “not vote” and that “both sides are bad”. I’m proud to have supported and voted for Biden and Harris, and I will forever believe that THEY DESERVED BETTER.
Now, back to soothing my nerves by bingeing on pork rinds and TCM movies.
I’ve been voting since I turned 18 and have never skipped a Presidential election. I’m grateful to have had relatives, friends, acquaintances, and teachers who emphasized the importance of voting, which is why I’ve always taken elections seriously. I’m also quite lucky to have grown up during a time when there was no social media to spew psyops and misinformation. (Although Faux News was all the rage 20 years ago, but I learned they were all bullshit from the start.) And, as a Bi woman of color, I learned it was best to not vote for leopards that would eat my face (thus my unapolgetic preference to vote Blue down-ballot). Third party? Non-voters?? I don’t know her.